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Some days I wake up feeling 60 and other days I wake up feeling 6. So if your within that age group .. we can relate.

Sunday, April 20, 2008

Let's hear what the Bachelors say .....

This year like the past years, i bought Cleo to check out the line up for this year's 50 most eligible bachelors. Erm i shan't comment on the guys chosen per say .... hey beauty is in the eye of the beholder right . Anyways what really caught my attention was the Q & A section where i found some of their answers to be ah how do i put this in a nice way ? Amusing ? See below for the ones which i found to be interesting. My comments are in blue :

When asked to fill in the blanks Why do women .......

Adrian Loh said "Say 'sorry' to me so often ? I always forgive them"
* Dude seriously ?

Alexander Guzowski said " Have periods?"
* Looks like someone failed Form 3 , Bab 1, ey

Ellyas Abdullah said " Overanalyse e-ve-ry thing"
* Ok wise guy u got me there

Santharuban Thurai Sundaram said "Vouch to be seen equal to man when in actual fact, men and women have different roles and are superior to one another in their specific roles ?"
* You should seriously go back and look up the word equality in the Dictionary. No seriously i mean it.

Faizal Yusof said "Blame everything on PMS when somethings go wrong"
* Ehm not all the time lah. You try having the pain of 100 people stabbing you once a month.

When asked What is a seersucker .....

* Well i didn't know what the hell was a seersucker myself but after Dictionary.com told me it was " A light thin fabric, generally cotton or rayon, with a crinkled surface and a usually striped pattern". It it was hilarious to see the guys bullshitting their way through on what they thought a seersucker was.

Alex Teh said "Suction cups to help ninjas climb walls under the shadow of the night"

Addie Arnizam said "Probably someone who's sucky to be with"

Nagaraj Rajendran said "A light cotton cloth with an uneven surface "
*One of the 2 guy who got it right ! However it all went downhill from there

Faizal Yusof said "It sounds like a sex toy"

Alexander Guzowski said "A pain in the you know what"

Mohd Ifran Mahmud said "Its the shortened form for the phrase you say when you overtake a sucky driver and you say it out loud with the windows down, see ya sucker!"

Rupert Chen said "Well a seer (like a magician/wizard kinda person) that likes to suck up to the CEO of all seers?"

Afshin Helmitabrizi said "A loser"

Well for these questions the guys can be separated into two groups . The clever sweet talkers . And the Honest fools.

For the question was A woman makes me nervous when......

The clever sweet talkers said :

"She does or says anything nice.That disarms me, I wouldn't know how to react" - Benjamin Chong

"They're sick or not feeling well. I wouldn't know what to do or how to take care of them" -Afshin Helmitabrizi

"Their frustratingly adorable" -Johann Lim

and there were the Honest fools who said :

"She has an Adam's apple" -Adam Zain

"She talks to much it gives me a headache" -Herve Leon

For the question What could women do more of......

The clever sweet talkers said :

"Ask a guy out. I would feel really honored" - Hedzri PJ

"Continue to manage financial matters so well" - Dinesh S

"They are fabulous enough now" - Owen Yap

"In general I think they are already doing a lot, so i find that there's nothing much really" - Bryan Low

In retrospect the Honest fools said :

"Put more effort into making themselves look more engaging" - Ahmad Risdan

"Be more articulate"
-Nas Muammar

"Agreeing with men"
-Alexander Guzowski
*Cant get any more caveman than that. Well i guess the next answer proves me wrong....

"Understand men better.Unlike women, when we have issues we don't talk it out.We just go hide in our little cave to be one with ourselves" -Bri
* If you refuse to come out from your 'cave' and talk about your 'issues' as you put, it how do you expect women to understand you ? Well unless you date psychic.

* So think about this right, this is a contest were people (mostly women) pick up their phones and SMS for their bachelor of their choice so which group do u think they would vote for ? The ones who called them 'frustratingly adorable' (which i think sounds pretty patronizing) and 'fabulous' or the one who were worried if they had a 'Adam's apple' (which i think sounds pretty idiotic) and think they look and speak funny. Go Figure .

When asked the question My life mission is too ......

Joshua Chong said "To say true to myself and maintain my sense of freedom"

Then we have
Ramsan who said "Have superpowers like Professor X in X-men"

Adrian Loh's was "Be a good father and help to solve humaitarian issues(especially regarding poverty and wars"

Premchand David Devaraj's life mission was to "Produce good-looking children"

Finally i leave you with few of these Bachelor hopefuls answers when asked the question If you were a product, how would your advertising campaign read.....

"Hug me and you'll feel good" -Murat Oezmen

"PDD (my initials) dark chocolate - once you try black you dont wanna go back!" - Premchand David Devera

"Support your local artistes.Get the original" - Naz Muammar

"If your not funny, your not Irfan-ny. Snort. Snort." - Mohd Irfan Mahmud

"Joy and happiness come in different forms and packages; you know you've found the right one when its 6'3" -Santharuban Thurai Sundaram

"Kenny Sia, bigger, bolder and rounder" -Kenny Sia

"Energizer - everlasting love to give" - Owen Yap

*Erm with those taglines these guys need to hire a good team of copywriters first if their ever gonna sell their product

Well there you have it , interesting Quotes from the Q & A sessions with this year's Cleo's 50 Most Eligible Bachelors . Now I wonder who will win .....


sawwaa! said...


babe, u made me laugh so hard la with ur comments!! damn, u good!

btw, i think owen will win. simply because he's the most famous out of all of them.

i wonder if joey ever joined....


Anonymous said...

Hey...very well written!

i too found your comments to be…how do put this in a nice way...amusing...yeah that's the word!

i wonder how you'd have answered the questions should you have been put on the spot? =)

It’s simple to comment on someone else’s answer you know….like your comment on Alexander Guzowski’s answer on…Why do women “have periods” – looks like someone failed Form 3 Bab 1????

Is that when you actually learnt about periods? Being a lady and all…you must have been pretty slow...which again explains your daft way of looking at things. Lol. I’m not too sure about your school, but in most other schools, performance of a student in one particular chapter rarely determines whether or not the student passes form 3.

The good thing here however, is that you do seem pretty honest! You came pretty clean on not knowing what seersucker was, I wonder how you’d have “bullshited” your way through though??? One with a level head would be able to tell that the question was put there in the first place to initiate “bullshits”, as in turn, it would appear to be an entertaining read to the readers…do you not agree?

If you were a product...how would your marketing campaign read??? Well once those guys have hired their team of copywriter…I think the first project they have at hand…is to try and market a girl, who sits behind four walls at the comfort of her couch, and comments about something in a rather ‘green’ way. When I say ‘green’ I meant it in the context of being both, envious, and immature.

Well, lets look at it from another angle; those guys were all asked these questions, spontaneously and under a certain pressure in terms of competition that lay ahead as well as the critic that may come if the answers was not up to par, given the scenario that they were facing an elite team of journalist and writers from one of Malaysia’s most esteemed magazine. You of course had lots to say. I would love to find out how you’d have done…and guess what? I pretty much got a gauge when I clicked on “VIEW MY COMPLETE PROFILE”.

With absolutely no pressure….to the question “what spells can you cast with a magic marker” you answered “colorful ones”…this not only reaffirmed my prediction of you being ‘green’, it lead me to read more about you, which is when I realized, that I was actually replying to one who is a self proclaimed weirdo with a ‘questionable’ job and a mere 174 profile views since 2007 on her blog which she considers to be her notebook.

Well, I’d suggest you rake in more credibility to yourself before you start commenting on others. =)

But being one who is not as shallow as you, I must say, you write pretty well, and there were a certain degree of humor in your comments. Take Care ‘Weirdo’.

Anonymous said...

ouch... very well said..but ouch..

MaL said...

Sawwaa : Hahaha hey girl i missed you in college today :) I think Owen might have a good chance of winning too , some of them are good too :) Joey has his no 1 fan to vote for him so i don't think the others have a chance :)

Anonymous 1 : Hey there thanks for your critical dissection of my post :) and for your profile analysis of myself :) What I wrote on this was my own personal opinion on what I read in the magazine :) Just like what you did when you read my post. Hey isn't that what blogs are for. ,my blog being my 'notebook' ergo my personal ranting space, is where I pen my 'shallow' thoughts to be read by my friends or even random people who stumble by such as yourself , not writing in hopes of being an internationally acclaimed blogger. As you pointed out, a dream I’d probably never will achieve with my mere 174 profile views :)

The post was written with humor in mind and not malice. I guess it’s hard to see that, when it’s being written.

Regarding Alexanders reply, my reference to form 3 bab 1 was, as that was where we first studied about the reproduction system. Writing with my friends in mind, who would understand this particular comment as we often refer to it in our jokes. His answer was probably said in humor and that’s why I chose to put it up.

Regarding the comments on how the bachelors would advertise themselves I found the way they said it to be hilarious. My comments on them were purely based on their answers and not judging their characters by only looking at what they wrote. I never claimed to be better then them and declare that if I was in their shoes my answers would be fantastic.

Ahahhaha honestly I liked my answer to the “what spells can you cast with a magic marker” being ‘colorful ones’ as I was referring to magic pens (the colourful pens we used to use when we were young) LoL . But if u think it’s a dumb answer I’m ok with it :) Everyone is entitled to their own personal opinions :)

I humbly thank you for your un-shallow compliment that there is a certain degree of humor in my comments, feel free to drop by anytime you need a laugh or when you feel the urge to call me ‘green’ again :) Take care “Anonymous.”

The green, shallow weirdo :)

Anonymous 2 : Thanks but i didn't feel the pain :) Thanks for dropping by :)

$uki3 said...

Anonymous 1, that's just hilarious. Even lit students don't overanalyse someone like that! Hahahahahahaha!!!

Get a life man. Or woman. Whatever.

Naviin said...

Hey Mal! Awesome post.

First off, anonymous, how do I put this in a nice way….hmmm… FUCK OFF.

Can’t you read shithead? She said Guzowki’s answer was stupid, I din’t see nothing about how she came to find out about periods. Since you’re so smart, why don’t you enlighten us on when do we actually know about periods ay? Lol. I’m not too sure on whether you’re actually really stupid or you’re just trying to get attention, but she mentioned nothing about being assessed in school based on your knowledge of a certain chapter in Form 3.

But, no worries, you’re just giving your two cent’s worth. Just like Mal, except she has a blog which people read. Talking about being level-head, you’re probably too ignorant to notice that this is a blog post Mal wrote to humor us, her readers. And we love it because it’s honest and funny. Obviously you’re too much of a retard to get humor through that thick skull of yours.

Wow, somebody is being judgmental. Wait, hold up, I might be wrong here. You’re probably referring to yourself about being envious and immature. I mean, after all, you are commenting on another person’s blog as anonymous. Too scared to reveal yourself? Aww, you were probably too daft to write a post like this yourself.

Well, that is the point isn’t it dumbfuck? Being spontaneous under pressure to weed out contestants who are not up to par. Wow, you have amazed me with your stupidity yet again. You’re shallower than I though you were. You actually clicked on View My Profile to get a ‘gauge’ on how Mal would answer those questions? I wasn’t aware blogspot was having a competition for the best answers under ‘View My Complete Profile.’ Did anyone else know about this?

And yet again, you never fail me anonymous. Tell me now, how did her answer of “colorful ones” to the question “What spells can you cast with a magic marker?” lead you to her being green? Oh wait, was it because she mentioned colorful and her blog add is green-rabbit? I get, it was because you were burning with envy that you came up with green. Pretty witty there I must say anonymous. “Self proclaimed weirdo”? Alright smart ass, define normal for us all, or better still, tell how a normal person would be like. Oh lookey lookey, u proved to us all what you’re actually after, with your statement “ a mere 174 profile views since 2007”, you’re just an attention seeking bitch.

So, tell us now, what is a blog if it’s not your personal notebook where you write your rants and happenings? I mean, to be honest, I am pretty sure nobody is holding a gun up to your head asking you to read this blog.

You know what, instead of giving suggestions; I suggest you start raking in more credibility to yourself before commenting on other, that too anonymously.

HAHA!!! Sorry I had to laugh so hard. That must’ve been the most contradictory statement of the year! You not shallow? Gosh, if there was a competition for it, you would definitely have a landslide victory. You would win for contradicting yourself. That was for you hun, incase you couldn’t wrap you head around it.

Oh well, you take care too love. We definitely hope to hear from you again, soon. I know at least I would love to. Go on, humor us with your un-witty comments.

One last thing though, there’s this saying, alls well that ends ok, so I’ll end this shit with a FUCK YOU but have a nice day =)

Naviin said...

Love you MAL! Missing you loads too!

Anonymous said...

I’ve been a silent reader of your blog ever since I found it when I goggled about Cambodia. From then on I was hooked, I love all your post as their both witty and clever. I have never commented before but when I read Anonymous comment on this post I knew I needed to say something. Firstly from one anonymous person to another would you please shut the fuck up. You throw your insults to her based on what one post and her profile page ? Now if that isn’t shallow I don’t know what is. I don’t know green rabbit in person but being an avid reader of her blog shallow is the last word I’d use to describe her. Would a shallow person blog on women’s rights ? poverty ? politics ?
You start your assignation of her character based on what she wrote . Tell me this from what she commented on the bachelors answers did she ever make them personal ? As far as I’ve read it I see her comments are only based on one thing THE ANSWERS ITSELF, she didn’t say their answers were a reflection of their character. If u came down from your moral high horse you would see that.
As far as I know blogs are for people to voice out their opinions and I see no wrong in what she did. Its ok of being critical of someone’s writings but don’t make baseless assumptions on them.
I being a male when reading the bachelors answers thought of way worst things then her , looking at how she put them in here I see the humor in their answers. If you wanna see malice you should look on what the rest of the World Wide Web has to say about them. I’VE read blogs with post called 50 most ineligible bachelors and there were people judge the guys purely based on their looks commenting they look stupid ,uguly ect. Now that IS shallow. To do so. In retrospect who are we to judge it is their personal opinion.
Green rabbit I think you write really well I’ve enjoyed every one of your post I hope you don’t let this persons comments affect you in any way because I think you Rock and by the looks of things so do ur friends.

MaL said...

Sukie : Haha ya anon would have made miss anne proud for sure :) Miss ya girl . Hope to see u soon.

Nav : You rock and i don't know what i'd do without you <3 Get ur ass back in Malaysia ASAP coffee on me . Miss you loads.

Anon: Your words really mean a lot. Thanks for reading my blog :) LoL your really nice I'm glad you googled about Cambodia :)

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